How to Respond to Teenage Angst and Live to Smile About It
Now that my step-children are in college, I find myself reflecting on the often laughable, two sentence conversations that we have survived. It is amazing to hear my co-workers recite these exact scenario’s with various responses. It confirms that my step-children were not unique in their angst:
Teen: “My friends think you are stupid for not letting me go with them!”
Response: “It’s a good thing I don’t care what your friends think.”
Teen: “I’m 16 and I don’t have to listen to you!”
Response: “I’m 42 and I still listen to my parents.”
Teen: “Who cares / What’s the big deal?”
Response: “I care. You’re the one making it a big deal.”
Teen: “I’m an adult and I can do what I want!”
Response: “You’re right, and adults deal with the consequences of their actions. Here are the consequences of your actions.”
Teen: “It’s my life!”
Response: “It’s my house.”
Teen: “Why do you care if I wear flip flops out in 2 feet of snow? Don’t I get to make my own choices?”
Response: “You can choose whatever you want, but you obviously need help narrowing down your choices.”
Teen: “It’s not fair!”
Response: “If it was fair, you’d do it again.”
Teen: “My friends mother is letting her go!”
Response: “If your friends mother pays for your college, she can have a say in what you do too.”
Teen: “I don’t care what people think, people should not judge me.”
Response: “So will you write a book so they can understand your stupid choices instead of judging you by your actions?”
Teen: “Dad swears and cusses… why can’t I?”
Response: “Adult language is for adults that understand where it is acceptable and where it is not; It is NOT acceptable in front of your parents.”
Teen: “I need to live it up now before I get too old to have fun… these are the best days of my life!”
Response: “Don’t peak too early. If these are the best days of your life then why do you complain so much?”
Technorati tags: Teens , Angst , Response , Parenting , Conflict+Resolution , ProBlogger
18 comments September 21st, 2006
